worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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