the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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