How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
