WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
