Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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