is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
