oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
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