this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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