does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
