I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize
