i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
as a side note pls kill me
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