My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
