All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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