At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
