He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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