with your own penis?
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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