My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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