At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
