Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
