No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
