when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
