I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize