ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize