I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
