I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
