my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
people are starting to question the shark bite story
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
