i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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