Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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