It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
