hell yes lets make some ravioli
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
