'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
