her vagine was all disorganized.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
