ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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