Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
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I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
