doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
just tell him i said nine months
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize