he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
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