Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
