I wish i was in the wii world.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
