Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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