$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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