So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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