This girl is more easily done than said...
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
