we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
