did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
