pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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