Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Randomize
