if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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