how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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