Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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