Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Randomize
