I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
